Precipitous news

Idly flicking though Google+, I see a news story about Charlotte Dujardin winning something.  Now, I already know who Charlotte Dujardin is, for reasons that will soon become exceedingly clear, but if you don't know who she is, let me cut and paste directly from Wikipedia for you:

Charlotte Dujardin OBE (born 13 July 1985) is an elite British dressage rider. The most successful British dressage rider in the history of the sport and the winner of all major titles and world records in the sport, Dujardin has been described as the most dominant dressage rider of her era.

As you can see, she's right up my street.  That paragraph could have been written specifically with me in mind.  She ticks soooo many boxes.  She tickles my pickle.

And because she's a dressage rider, here's comes a jump break just for you.  Don't say I never give you anything...

She also happens to be insanely hot

Just...  the dress, the shoes, all the other shoes, the hair, the ensemble, the class, the privilege, the deep need inside of me to perform a curtsey...

This is why I already know all about her.  I've read all about her before, around the time of her two gold medals in the London Olympics.  I know about her because of a particular habit of mine when I come across noteworthy women in the news who tick one or more of my boxes.  I immediately seek them out and start to build a fantasy around whatever foothold I can find.  Things that happen in the real world, either in the media, or in my daily life, precipitate a descent into my fantasy sex addiction.

I can't remember if I was feeling particularly horsey when I first came across her, but I do remember my fantasies taking a strong turn in that direction on the back of my researches, which is how it usually works with news stories that I come across in my everyday life.  It becomes fuel for my fire, and me being me, I find as much fuel as possible and fan the flames like a beast.

And the fire doesn't always burn in the way that I expect, and sometimes it doesn't really burn at all.  I'd been farting around for a few days trying to get some sort of fantasy around the sport of Modern Pentathlon with little success.  It has fencing and horse-riding and running and guns in it, so I thought I had a pretty good chance of getting something from it, but nothing solidified.  Then, along comes Ms Dujardin and my equestrian fire flares up very nicely indeed, because...

Well...  damn...

And now she's been mentioned in the news again, so now I've gone and found these two amazing pictures.  What would usually happen at this stage is that I'd obsess over them, maybe post a few on various places around the internet, and if I had the opportunity, maybe start work on a horse-training spreadsheet game or similar.  It would eat up my time, most of which would be spent scouring the web for exactly the right riding whip sound, and things would fizzle out before I ever completed the project.

Today I've done something a little different.  I've still shot off into my fantasy world at the first whiff of a good lead, and I'm still obsessing over the images of this equestrian apotheosis, but now I'm coming to the end of my blog post, I feel as if I'm more or less done, after only half an hour or so.  I've lanced the boil and achieved... closure?  Am I exorcised?

Let's hope so.

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